Добавлено: 04/12/02 в 23:29

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say: "Emma come first. Then I come. Two asses, they come together. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once a more."

"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey cool down, lady," said the man. "I justa tell my friend how to spell Mississippi."

Добавлено: 04/12/02 в 23:43

Conversation with BushGeorge: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi : Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi : Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi : That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi : Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi : Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi : Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi : Hu.
George: The Chinaman!
Condi : Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
Condi : I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi : That's the man's name.
George: That's who's name?
Condi : Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of
China?
Condi : Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle
East.
Condi : That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi : Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi : No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi : Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi : No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get
me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi : Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi : You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi : You don't want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And
then get me the U.N.
Condi : Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi : Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi : And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi : Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi : Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi : Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

Добавлено: 04/12/02 в 23:48

Ну повесилили! Спасибо!

Добавлено: 04/12/02 в 23:53

топик посвящен шовинистически настроеному Kit-у
руки прочь от английских заголовков

Добавлено: 05/12/02 в 01:10

Ага, насчет заголовков я шовинист, а насчет содержания, без проблем.

Добавлено: 08/12/02 в 20:31

Three men, an Italian, a French and a Spanish went for a job interview
in England.
Before the interview, they were told that they must compose a sentence
in English with three main words: green, pink and yellow.

The Italian was first:
"I wake up in the morning. I see the yellow sun. I see the green grass
and I think to myself, I hope it will be a pink day."

The Spanish was next:
"I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana, a green
pepper and in the evening I watch the pink panther on TV."

Last was the French:
"I wake up in the morning, I hear the phone "green...green...", I pink
up the phone and I say "Yellow ?..."

Добавлено: 26/12/02 в 10:35

who's a diplomate - a man who can convince his wife she looks ugly in fur coats

what are high heels - the invention of a short girl who got tired of being kissed on cheeks